How to win friends and influence people for girls (but not only for girls) by Donna Dale Carnegie - Summary
Part II
Boost their ego
If a genie appeared and told you it could grant you one wish, what would it be? Let me guess: A cool car, to be famous, to win the lottery or just one million more wishes? Let me tell you that everything everybody ever wants is to feel important to others and be loved by other people. This is how Donna Dale Carnegie starts the chapter “The Big Secret of Dealing with People.” It is true; feeling appreciated or loved by others can make you feel amazing inside and out! If you want someone to like you the easiest way to achieve that goal is to do the same for them: compliment them, express gratitude for them and just boost their ego. Here are some tips & tricks regarding these skills:
1. Compliment them
Being complimented on something makes you proud, especially if the compliment refers to an insignificant detail about the person. If there is something that makes someone more special in your eyes; let them know. Donna Dale Carnegie phrased it well: “Every single person in your life has something to offer.” You can make their day!
2. Express your gratitude for them
You don’t have to only thank people for the awesome things they do. Saying thank you regularly and expressing your gratitude can not only make you a kind and grateful person but can make the person your thanking feel great about what they did. A good example are your parents. You might expect your mom or dad to make dinner for you, do your laundry or drive you to school, but to tell them thank you for the small things they do can help them want to do good deeds for you more often. This can come in handy for persuasion which I'll talk about in a later edition. Donna Dale Carnegie said “And why be stingy with gratitude? Giving thanks costs you nothing, while making others feel priceless.”
3. Boost their ego
I think Donna Dale Carnegie said it best so let's read an extract from her book: “By making people feel important and giving their ego a boost, you can literally transform them. And this doesn’t just apply to people you're already close to. […] by acknowledging others’ gifts, by recognizing their beauty and their strengths, we can inspire them to achieve their full potential. And by living authentically and being true to your own values, you’ll blossom into the person you most want to be.” Doesn’t this want to make you become a grateful person?